On the house!

Sex Party Checklist: House Party Version

North Star
6 min readOct 16, 2023

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I wrote about preparing for hotel sex parties recently — thanks for all the feedback! House parties have a far wider range of experiences, and after a house party this weekend, I realized there’s enough differences to warrant a revised list!

The main one: your hosts set the rules and those can be flexible, and that you don’t have the home base of your hotel room to work with.

There is a customized invite list, and that means the hosts decide who is worthy of an invite — who will behave themselves related to consent and boundaries, who will be a good guest even though there are unusual sexy things happening. Your goal is a lot more about privacy and not getting your host in trouble with neighbors or liable for anything bad that happens, plus making time to have fun!

  • The good news: house parties tend to be smaller and have a more consistent culture, so you can get tone and flavor from the hosts more accurately. They know who is coming (tee hee!) and what the parameters around bisexuality, full swapping, BDSM and conversations are, most likely. (Best to check in, though!)
  • It can be more polyamory-friendly, with more than just a dyad invited, and it can be more queer-friendly with more expressions of sexuality welcomed. This can be a huge factor in experience and experimentation. (From what I’ve heard

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North Star

Curiosity flows and I must write. Join me for adventures & insights about my kinky, polyamorous adventures. For more: Instagram.com/NorthStarMatches