My Sex Survey SAYS….it works!

It’s vetting and boundaries and compatibility all in one….

My play partner compatibility questionnaire just passed 200 respondents, and it’s both an amazing asset and one with potential that I’m not working like I should. Let me explain.

In the beginning, this started as a takeoff from something I heard about in sex ed circles called “We Should Try It,” a partner quiz to try to spice things up. Each person fills out the survey and it only shares the areas where they match up. This can be a great tool, especially if there are areas that the couple may not have discussed as a interest due to fear or shame, for example, a type of kink or one of the taboo list. I think it’s great, and you SHOULD try it!

During the beginning of my polyamorous dating, I started with that, and then as the pandemic began to shift my dating life online, I wanted it to be more customized. So I used Google forms to make one, and I’ve revised it dozens of times since then. I generally write about it every 25 or so new surveys, but I haven’t in awhile.

Here’s why it works so well:

I have a lot of choices, thankfully, due to some gender dynamics, and it helps me narrow down who I actually want to take the time to meet in person. Some people want to rush to that, but I find it too risky. I find the pressures of hook up culture and the serious dangers to women’s safety and privacy are increased by meeting too soon.