Kink Conversation Highlights

Perhaps the KinkNotes? Some basics with links to more…

I got called into a kink workshop on short notices and thought that my notes made for a great high level primer. See what you think.

My PolyKinky Mottos

There are necessary mindset shifts to doing this well, finding good partners and avoiding unnecessary pain:

• Rejection is the gift of unwasted time, know your dealbreakers ahead of time, and thank people when you aren’t their cup of tea.
• Clarity is kindness: Be clear, but also help people understand how to love you by knowing yourself well.
• Use the Poly Pause as a way to manage feelings. Timing matters but polyamory sometimes gives you more time.
• Work the Process: Dating profiles matter, The Gauntlet, first date protocol, dealing with Being stood up, the B+ date, onboarding needs.
• You will have to make Choices: create a matrix that’s something like “hire slow, fire fast” or “if it’s not a Hell Yeah, it’s a No.” Decide if you want to date in the wild, or only other poly kinky queer folx.