Back in early 2022, I wrote about poly contentment and the reasons to celebrate that. The “new love,” I referred to, is still an avid reader of mine, but now my steady, deep love and that is a remarkable thing. So I’ll revisit that theme…. it’s nice to be able to remember that there are highs as well as lows.
- Things are always complicated, and finding a bit of joy within the tangles of daily life makes it seem so much better. For part of the year, it looked like lunchtime sex dates as we managed kids home more in the summer and work schedules. Not always easy, but we framed it well as temporary and increased the heat…even working in some creative scenes in that short period of time.
- My bigger life…is even bigger now. I have not made any changes to the polycule in months, which is extremely unusual for me. Besides my nesting partner and my steady love/boyfriend, I have a comet about 90 minutes away and a local play partner friend (a woman…which is fascinating to navigate.)
- I want to offer hope for other people who don’t know if it’s just a utopian hippie dream to have more than one partner and it not be constant chaos. I can attest that on last night, my girlfriend(? still trying that term out) met another friendly play partner, and I left them having drinks to sleepover at my boyfriend’s house which is now routinely two or three nights a week. I have my own medicine cabinet space and a dresser drawer and a phone charger there! Oh, and a house key. :) (Poly milestones…) BF is now part of my family life in ways that are new, coming to parties and going on outings with me and my kids.
- Meeting partners…well, not only did my BF recently meet the polyamory role model I mentioned, he’s met several of my partners (and played with some of them as well.) I have also met his new partner on my own…it’s a whole new world.
Even though I’m polysatured at the moment, and work is taking up a lot more of my time and brain, I see this success as evidence that my process works. Lots of iteration in this process leads me to a place where I can see that I need to keep the bar high…because there are amazing people out there who can really do this. I am so grateful for these opportunities to get to know them, to experience them and have them care for me.
I believe feeling content is not just acceptance of goodness, but a satisfaction that the thing we are striving for is possible and …we deserve pleasure and joy.
I wanted a nearby sexual partner whose brain fascinates me, who is good at honest communication and willing to adventure with me. And, today, I’ve got him…still.
In some ways, I have it in triplicate. I’ll try to hold it loosely and enjoy it, without being too smug. :)
Please do share your stories! It’s important to mark the evolution of our own personal growth and journeys.